I am a person with ADHD married to a person with ADHD, and I have been a psychotherapist for over a decade. I have worked with a variety of clients, including couples. I see more and more how much damage is being done in the world from ADHD-impacted relationships being poorly understood and poorly managed. I am offering this work based on the great need I am seeing for compassionate support for both members of the couple.
My practice is inclusive. You are welcome to work with me even if:
- You are not cisgender.
- You are not heterosexual.
- You practice ethical non-monogamy.
- You or your partner are interested in kink.
- You’ve experienced judgment from another professional about some other factor.*
*I am still required to follow the law. I am a mandated reporter for suspected abuse of children and vulnerable adults, and for those who pose an imminent danger of harm to self or others. If you have experienced judgment previously, I ask you to please be open with me about that so I can ensure I provide a reparative experience for you on that issue.
About My Approach
My approach will always be tailored to the individual needs of the couple. But generally speaking, there are three major phases to the work. Not every couple will need all three, and they won’t always be in the same order.
- Education: We talk about what symptoms of ADHD can look like. This is often brand new information for both the person with ADHD and the partner. We begin to rewrite the story of the couple using this knowledge.
- Triage: We identify the major pressure points on the relationship, and begin to target those pressure points systematically. This is accomplished through practical steps and involves change on the part of both individuals.
- Relational Healing: Once the triage is done so the “bleeding” can stop, we get to work repairing lost positive feelings, lost trust, improve communication and other more traditional couples therapy methods. I may draw from Gottman Method, Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, Imago therapy or Relational Life Therapy depending on the needs of the couple.